It wasn't losing you that broke my heart,
it was losing what I thought I deserved.
I thought I deserved love.
And whether I deserved it or not,
whether we get what we deserve, or what we don't,
whether we deserve everything, or deserve nothing,
it's irrelevant.
It was my perspective that broke my heart,
not you.

And I guess it's hard for me to admit to myself,
that it was never you that I was working for,
I was working for myself.
I guess it's hard for me to admit I'm so selfish.
I guess it's hard to admit that whether it was you or someone else,
my heart would have broken just the same way.
I guess it's hard to admit that you weren't a factor,
it was all me.
My existence, and my perspective was all that had be there,
for my heart to break the way it did...
not you.

I guess it's hard to admit that I feel everyday is a constant struggle,
and that the sum of my life to this date is a tragedy,
because it's pathetic.
I guess it's hard for me to admit that everyday seems like a struggle,
and that there are so many problems in my way,
and yet I keep working as hard as I can,
and somehow that makes me deserve better,
and I when I think that I have what I deserve and I lose it: I cry,
because it's pathetic.

And everything I'm working for,
to be better, to have better...
whether I succeed at it or fail,
it's always the imperfections that I seem to seek.
And the perfections of this world are hidden to my eyes,
they slip past my gaze.

And it's pathetic,
that even though I know I have no right to lash out at people because I think that I have so many problems in my life...
I still do it.

I guess it's hard for me to admit to myself that I'm pathetic,
but it's easy for me to tell you.

And I guess it's hard to admit to myself that I am who I am.
But, in the end, I will change anyways.

In the end, I will change.